when the one that's needed was there without realization
baekhyun is tired and it never shows. he bounces around on his heels, smiles at fans, smacks chanyeol away— but he's exhausted. body aches, ears throb, and his throat feels raw to the point where there a moments that he just wishes someone would tell him to shut up. being the mood maker is weighing on him and he prays that somehow this plane ride to wherever they're going gives him a little peace. there's guilt in hopes that chanyeol continues to stick to wu fan the way he has because baekhyun can just breathe and swim in his thoughts.
so he does that.
head resting against the seat he's taken up by the window of the airplane, eyes closed and inhaling deeply as he just listens to his members shuffling around him. there's catches of mandarin and korean and english in the form of a curse when wu fan drops his phone and junmyeon laughs at him.
baekhyun can feel the rest of the members eye him cautiously because when is he ever just quiet? and he can feel them pause in the aisle before shuffling off, muttering about not disturbing the kid and maybe he feels ill. relief floods him and holy shit maybe he'll get a row all to himself on this midnight plane, but the thought shatters when someone sits next to him. the scent of soap and clean, crisp laundry filling his nostrils as the person settles in as delicately as possible, movements muted.
luhan, he thinks.
there's been an unspoken vibe between them lately, an almost weird gravitational pull on both ends. baekhyun follows him around, eager to put his hand on his shoulder and walk with him, enjoying the slight accented korean that tumbles from his mouth. it's the past few weeks of closeness that have proven how similar they are in essence. luhan is a trouble maker under the calm exterior and baekhyun is actually a lot more peaceful than he chooses to let on. they compliment each other, their teasing usually landing them in fits of attempted quiet laughter that earns a stern look from jongin.
it's this that pulls him out of his trace, a gentle smile from luhan coming into focus once his eyes adjust to the darkened plane.
"sleepy? you can't sleep when i'm around. it's not allowed."
baekhyun shifts in his seat on his side, his joints aching and making him feel older than he is, but luhan is like a slow working pain killer so he doesn't mind.
"that's why i'm so sleepy," he muses with a drowsy smirk. "you've been around so often that i don't have time to sleep. you're like this annoying little puppy that just yaps in my ear."
luhan's eyes widen and he smacks his chest over his heart with an open palm, mouth dropping in mock outrage and baekhyun can't help, but notice how his eyes crinkle with a smile.
"i am the best hyung you have, byun baek. don't you forget it."
he never does.
it's 12:34am or maybe it's 1:34am, but it's hard to tell when baekhyun's eyes sting with tears of exhaustion. he never complains because there are eleven other men in the room, t-shirts soaked with sweat and flashes of skin littered with bruises everywhere he looks. there are empty water bottles piled up in a corner, towels in another and even though he's leaning against the mirror, it does little to cool his skin. practice is over and done with for the day. everyone is packing up, some quickly, some slowly with expressions of pain.
it hurts to look at. it literally shoots to the core and he needs to close his eyes so he can't see it anymore. he doesn't want to see it and he doesn't want to feel this tired and he doesn't want to miss his family this much.
strong hands grip his biceps, pulling his weight up because baekhyun's been slowly sliding down the mirror and the sweat sliding down his face isn't sweat but his own tears. it's embarrassing and everyone knows because there's a hurried shuffle of feet and the sound of closing doors.
baekhyun can't hold the whimper that escapes him, his body keening forward against the other's. he pants angrily against luhan's sweat soaked shirt and digs his nails into his pale forearm. baekhyun wants to translate his pain, he wants some of it to leave him, but it refuses and builds until it's balled up painfully in his throat. luhan holds strong, not a sound escapes him even though baekhyun knows he's hurting him and he snaps, a sob piercing the quiet practice room.
he hates it and his throat burns as he collapses against luhan, gripping his shirt because he can't hold his own weight anymore. so they sink to the ground and luhan cradles him while he weeps and curses and he's just an incoherent mess until he's just barely whimpering like the lost little boy he is.
"let's go home."
neither of them are sure how the arrangement came to play. it happens almost every day. practice ends, a coin is flipped, and they walk to a dorm in silence. they never say a word once they leave the practice room, they don't speak when they walk into the dorm, they say nothing while they shower, no words are uttered as they crawl into the same bed.
limbs tangle, heads rest on shoulders and their breathing steadies as sleep threatens them from the bay of the ocean it sails on. they never speak.
but baekhyun can swear that sometimes when sleep has him in its clutches, he can hear luhan softly singing a lullaby in mandarin against his ear, warm breath sinking into his skin.
they're like two tornados who've met in the middle of a field. shirts are being grabbed and pulled up over heads, tossed into the wind. the sound of buckles clinking against each other and their hurried panting ringing in baekhyun's ears as jeans are torn off.
it was so simple. just a glance during a movie and they were on each other. lips crashing, hands desperately clawing at exposed skin and baekhyun can taste tea on luhan's tongue. it's everything they need and crave: affection, closeness, and solace. solace is what they always were.
there's no questions asked because that's not who they are. whispered commands against lips are where they've always been. baekhyun doesn't protest luhan's touch, arching into his hands with a quiet whimper so unlike his usual tired one. a whine of protest only comes when luhan leaves his bed and digs around in a drawer for a couple minutes.
there's a soft click and a slippery sensation, then a painful one, but it's everything. it resonates and spreads out through baekhyun's veins. his hands reaching up, pushing hard against luhan's chest to hold him still while he bathes in the ache.
there's a nod and some amateur movement because neither of them have really done this before, but baekhyun feels like he's clinging to the edge. moans tumble from lips when a rhythm is found and then luhan hits that spot that baekhyun didn't even know was there and he's begging silently, hands pressing hard against luhan's tailbone.
shudders roll through both and they break, touching ground and destroying with their groans. it's so quick and they're shooting back into the atmosphere from which they came. chests heaving, a thin layer of sweat gleaming on skin.
baekhyun is still tired constantly. he still fights off exhaustion and he smiles when he doesn't want to, but it's worth it when he settles into an airplane seat and luhan settles in the one next to him. it isn't until they're both back in the air that they surrender. fingers laced, heads lolling onto shoulders, and the sound of luhan singing them both to sleep.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: this is a lot more baekhyun centric than i meant it to be, but it is what it is. also: baekhan/lubaek/baeklu (what is this ship's name) is vastly underrated. excuse any typos as this was written over 2 weeks and i'm bound to skip over my own mistakes. yay writing (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ✧
NOTE 2: i forgot to turn off ip logging! my apologies for the invasion of privacy. previous comments have been screened. you're welcome to leave a new one ^^;